Fandom?

I can't help but get a little sad and down now. Because JS has decided to leave the fandom, JE fandom, NEWS fandom, all these fandoms. Well, like a commentor had said, "it's just a matter of time." But, I've only came in for a year or so, and I'm still so new and fresh in this fandom! But suddenly I feel that people around me are drifting further away from me. I really can't help but feel a little sad. Seeing how she posted the things she wants to give away, I totally didn'have the courage to read on.

I wrote to her:

This post really came as a shock to me..
Or probably, it didn't.
Since I've always known that you have had this thought already.
But I was truly looking for this "April Fool" word in the post and was hoping that this was just an overdue April Fools' Prank.
Should I be glad or sorry that I made you buy Koi no ABO LE?
Anyway, I respect your decision because I think it is wise of you to consider such mature things~^^
To be frank, I'll feel lonely though, because I'll have one less person to fangirl and discuss with~
But I hope our friendship will still last!
Please continue to friend me? *laughs*
(PS. If you're willing, I don't mind accepting the photos and the sticker! And actually, I want to know if anyone has already booked that file? Group file. But argh, I'm broke at the moment, so if you have already found potential buyer, go ahead and sell~)

Alright, all the best to you!
Somehow, I wished I had gone online just now.
I'll truly prefer you breaking the news directly than reading this post.
But anyway, stay strong and cheerful always? *laughs*
I shall still see you online then! 
Ganbatte!

I wonder what all these words mean to her now. But anyway, I'm really unsure of this fandom now. Because I'm beginning to feel lonely in this fandom, to be honest. I really don't have any friends who can share the joy with me or whom I can share my joy of this fandom with. Spilling all on this blog is not enough. I need a reply at times too. That's what I've been thinking lately when I posted about NEWS "Koi no ABO" news. Because I always post after fangirling with JS, I sort of lost the joy of posting here too. My main reason was to fangirl here alone, but somehow I've grown to like fangirling with friends. And even though JS and I may not be really that close (friendship + closeness), I really enjoy her accompany and I've slowly depended on her for many sources of news and joy and everything. To know that she's leaving really makes me sad. Because who can I turn to now? 

Probably back to here again. Back to square one. I don't know. Finding friendships based on fandom is difficult, and to continue on without fandom is even harder I think. But I hope JS and I can last as friends.

Speaking of which, I'm really worried about my friendship with Emy now. I'm not sure what's going to happen. I'll probably be missing in action on LJ, and I won't have anyone to sms about NEWS too. 

JS, I'll really miss you.

And NEWS, I'll miss you.